“Lilacs” by Scott J. Allen (creative commons license applies)

“My mother said to me, ‘If you are a soldier, you will become a general. If you are a monk, you will become the Pope.’ Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.” ~ Pablo Picasso

My mom was a cheerleader. No, not the “uniform with pompoms” kind. She was and is far more than that, especially to me. I relate to the Picasso quote above, not because of me but because of my mother. She is the kind of mom every boy should have had. She’s strong and quietly supportive. A giver. An amazing giver.

She coached and coaxed the best out of the men in her life, one by one. My father, then my brother, then me. Each of us are better and stronger men because of her influence and support. She instilled confidence. Confidence that I could be anything I wanted to be and do anything I wanted to do. Many of my early successes as an adult were because she built courage in me to take risks – especially for the people I love and the things in which I believe.

She is fiercely loyal and unwaveringly supportive.

She is loving and self-sacrificing. Always has been.

As a child, I never knew the sacrifice with which my parents gave. As a child I always thought we were rich – she’s always had a way of making people feel that way. I didn’t realize until later that the extravagant Christmases weren’t a product of monetary wealth, but a product of my mother’s personal wealth: consistently putting others before herself.

She’s still that way. Still amazing as ever.

Here’s to you, mom. You are the best. I’m grateful for you and all you’ve done. I’m grateful for the example you set of what real love looks like. I’m just sure your giving is thought of in Heaven like that of Cornelius in Acts 10, “…your prayer has been heard, and your charities have been put on record before God.”

She’s probably a bit embarrassed that I’ve written all of this for you to read. You see, she’s always been more comfortable out of the spotlight, taking the role of cheerleader, encourager and coach.

Donna Jean Allen, you are a great mother. Always have been. Always will be. Happy Mother’s Day.

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and find the prisoner was you.” ~ Corrie ten Boom

We’ve all been wronged. At some point, we’ve all been dealt some kind of hand that is less than ideal. We have all had to deal with people and situations that inflicted hurt and pain in our lives.

Some of us wear it like a badge. A big, ugly badge. Some of us have allowed ourselves to become hostages of the past. Prisoners of what happened. Or didn’t happen. Or what was said. Or wasn’t said. Push them and they may push back harder than you thought. Poke them and they may “go off” like a time bomb. Scratch them and you might get more than you bargained for… venom.

Some of us have forgotten that we don’t have to live as captives. Some of us have forgotten that we have been set free and hold the power to do the same for others. Some of us could leave our unlocked prison cells today. Actually, all of us could. More accurately, we could empty the whole prison. That is, if we remembered to leave it and bring others with us.

A very wise friend of mine once said “Hurt people hurt people. Blessed people bless people.”

The choice is yours. You can choose to be hurt, or you can choose to remember you are blessed and free.

It shouldn’t have a hold on you any more.

No matter what it is they did or didn’t do, let them go.

Release them.

Go free.

Let it go. Would you please?

Thirty years ago today, Debbie and I were married. (yes, that’s her in the pic above – couldn’t resist)

Thirty years… wow, where did the time go?

My words are not even remotely adequate to express my love and gratitude for a much better life than I could have ever imagined back in those days. I give the glory to God and the credit to Debbie. She is a Proverbs 31 woman: smart, funny, adventurous, full of life, and the most loving, caring and nurturing person I have ever known.

Debbie is simply amazing. I jokingly and lovingly call her “Mary Poppins.” For a myriad of reasons. She does difficult things with grace and ease, like… you know, Mary Poppins.

She is the one for me. Hands down. I love her every December 18th. And every Tuesday. And every other day that ends in “day.”

Tonight we are celebrating with a quiet dinner, and again with our kids later this week. Celebrating the first thirty years of our life together. Celebrating enduring love. Celebrating each other.

I love you, Debbie Allen. Every December 18th.

And every Tuesday.

And every other day.

Twenty one years ago today I became a father for the second time. Our first was a girl – all girl, this one… all boy.

Before he came we wrestled with his name. David? No. Jordan? Maybe. We kind of liked Jordan, but that wasn’t really it either. Incidentally, our daughter Nicole married a Jordan this summer – turns out there was a Jordan in our family’s future.

So what about our son? What do we name him? Our pastor and mentor advised us that his name would be very important and to name him wisely. So we prayed, inquiring about the name of our son. And we waited for the answer.

Late one evening, it was time to go to the hospital. Time to have a baby. Time to have a baby boy. A red-haired, feisty baby boy. My red-haired, feisty baby boy.

His name?

Justin. Yes, that’s it. He’s Justin. Justin Scott Allen.

I loved him as soon as he was born. I love him much more now. He is quite a man of God. I’m a proud dad, thankful every day that Justin came into our lives.

Love you, son. Happy 21st birthday!

One hundred thirty years ago (1882) Americans began celebrating Labor Day as a “workingmen’s holiday.”

For most of us it’s a long weekend, maybe a short getaway or family cookout.

How are you celebrating it this year?

Leave a comment and let us know!

original photos by Scott Allen

Today is the day I give my precious daughter to another man, the man of her dreams.

Today is the day we walk down the aisle together, then I to my seat, and she to the altar.

Today she will be a beautiful bride, and he will finally see her in her wedding dress for the first time.

Today is the day she makes the commitment of a lifetime, to a man worthy of a lifetime commitment.

Today is the day we celebrate the goodness of God for the last 23 years, and celebrate His goodness to them in the next 23. And the the next 23 after that. And so on.

Today is the day we release her into the family she will build with her husband-to-be, and also the day we drop the “to-be” part.

Today is the day I get a second son, and my first son gets a brother.

Today is the day we dance.

Today is the day we eat cake.

Today is the day we send them on their honeymoon with the showers of hundreds of sparklers.

Today is the day my precious Nicole Frances Allen becomes Nicole Frances Covarelli.

I love you Nicole Frances Covarelli.

I always will.

I am so thrilled for you, and for the joy of this day.

Love,

Dad

This Friday our daughter Nicole is getting married to the man of her dreams. We are thrilled for the two of them. What a team!

I’m sure you can imagine the level of chaos in our lives and in our home this week as all of the final preparations are being made. Dinners with family (Happy Birthday, Mom), errands, wedding set-up, airport runs, reception set-up, cakes, flowers, more errands, rehearsal, rehearsal lunch, more errands and (last but not least) lot’s of checks being written.

In the midst of all of this activity we are remembering to stop, breathe and be thankful. God is faithful. We are grateful for all He is doing in and with us this week. Busy is okay sometimes if there’s purpose in it. Trust me, there’s plenty of purpose going on here… our family is growing. I’ll have a new son in just a few days.

So as we go about our week of preparation, know we are enjoying the Lord, enjoying each other and enjoying our lives.

Here, there and everywhere – here we come!

What a thrill.

Today is my daughter’s birthday. She’s turning 23 and I’m not sure where all the time went. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t that long ago that Debbie and I went to the hospital for her birth… but, birthdays don’t lie. Still, I’m not quite sure how it’s possible.

I’m not sad about the time that’s passed as if has gotten away from us in a bad way. It hasn’t in the least. I have no regrets. I have been present not just in her life, but in the details of her life for all of her life. I love her with all my heart and she loves me, too. I’m really not sad at all, just reflective.

Why am I so reflective?

23 years ago we named her Nicole and gave her our family name. This will be her last birthday with our family name.

In June she will marry the man of her dreams. However, long before Jordan became the man of her dreams he was the man of our prayers. For 23 years we have been praying for her mate, believing God for a man that will love and care for her as Christ loves the church. Believing for a man who will make her laugh. A man she can believe in. The man for her.

She found him.

We couldn’t be more thrilled. We are thankful beyond words.

Today, we’re celebrating Nicole’s birthday with a bridal photo shoot. A perfect transition!

March 13^th will always be “Nicole Day” in our home, as it has been for the last 23 years. Next March 13^th will still be “Nicole Day.” We will still be her parents. She will still be our girl. The only thing changing is her family name. While this is our last time to celebrate Nicole Allen Day, next year will be our first year to celebrate Nicole Covarelli Day.

Same girl.

Same birthday.

Different name.

Help us celebrate this year’s “Nicole Day” by following her amazing blog, Healthy Isn’t Hard. Maybe she’ll help you as much as she helps us to stay healthy. She’s well worth following and well worth celebrating!

I love you Nicole Allen. Happy 23^rd birthday!